I have wanted to write this blog for weeks, its answer pressing on me as I sit sneezing, coughing, achy, stuffy head,  Kleenex feverishly strewn about in a trail from my  bed to my computer. So I sit Indian style in my favorite jammies,  gurgling, nursing my tea, missing dancing with my beloved friends this Sunday morning, torn between caring for myself and showing up for the rest of life.