My mother told me I was lucky if I could count all my real friends on one hand! Must have been fifteen or so years ago now, when it occurred to me after a string of disappointing intimate relationships that maybe she was right—again.
- Unavailable partners
- Feeling like you’re not a priority or valued by your partners
- Attracting men who are not interested in commitment
- Not interested in or attracted to men who show you lots of interest
- Attracting partners who don’t treat you well
- Feeling unworthy of the relationship of your dreams
- Feeling tired of dating people who aren’t a good match and ready to give up on love
First, this is a rant, not a blog. I hope you will indulge me anyway. There are few things I feel more passionate about, and I know I am not alone. Having been a single mom for over ten years, I know so many of you can, do and will relate. And I must warn you, it’s rated R, so I apologize in advance for any offense that may occur. Here we go…
This week I have a few questions for you. More often than we are willing to admit we are drawn to relationship for external reasons: money, security, fear of being alone, children, validation, sex, boredom, or to avoid dealing with (or to be rescued from) another situation. Let’s take on money first!
When I was a kid I figured Nature was basically a guy thing, the same way I supposed wearing wigs, for example, was primarily a girl thing. That’s probably because when I was growing up it was men who did things like hunt, spear, shoot, capture and in some cases kill while the females stayed, let’s say, nearer to the hearth (or shopping mall).
Here are the top 5 male mating myths: let me know if you have other suggestions!
1) All the good ones are taken;
2) A man’s penis has a mind of its own;
3) All men only want one thing;
4) Men are dogs;
5) Good guys are boring.
Sound familiar? Let's take a closer look.
6) Be a conscious ROLE MODEL.What are we saying to our girls? This is a tough reality but well worth looking at. And what are we saying to our young men? That women are objects, that men should like this fake version versus the real? Did our mothers teach us nothing, did our grandmothers and sisters and all the women who fought for our freedom not teach us that we are enough? All I am saying is, be clear about one thing; they are not only watching, but
People ask me all the time; are you and your husband for real. “Because if you are, I want that too!” If it is defined as a relationship where two people respect each other, wake up every day wondering how they can make each other’s life better and more fulfilling, punctuated by a definition of love not for the faint of heart, “I want what you want for yourself,” then I say, “yes,” it’s for real. The caveat being, how we got to have it involved some critical elements. One of which was
I just have to share some of the things I learned in my Philosophy class. Dr. Schreibman is a brilliant teacher, and you won’t believe what I’m finding out! I quote (myself, in a recent paper, leaving out the footnotes and bibliography): In ancient western civilization (700-300 BCE) women were relegated to three primary roles: Wife, Slave or Prostitute. During this period they were further regarded as men’s legal wards, could not own property or engage in significant business transactions. A woman’s children belonged to the husband